Weaning nth time

Tonight I succeeded in putting Alon to sleep without nursing. It was more of a forced circumstance than a choice. Last night, while he was nursing, I had some fake contractions. They don't really hurt but are pretty inconvenient. The not-good thing about it is it could escalate to full force contractions which I do not want at 34 weeks. I need to grow the little one some more.

I talked to Alon telling him we can not "dede" for a while because it gives Nanaynthe "ouchy". Wasn't really sure if he understood but I kept repeating it to him for most of the night. I also allowed him a longer play time with the iPod. This goes against my usual parenting rules but I coukd hardly keep up with him now, so some compromise had to be made.

He did ask to nurse but I was firm that it was not possible. I told him he can nurse again once baby brother is out and if he still wants to but not before then. He, of course, put up a struggle butwe eventually managed to sleep without nursing. His tantrum was actually shorter compared to allowing him to nurse then asking him to stop in the middle of the process.

There is at least thee weeks to go (I pray), so I'll have to see if he will be totally weaned or not. I'm open to tandem nursing but it would be much reprieve to just feed one as the other has had his due. Nonetheless, in his own time. 

34 weeks

You've been very active my Little Wiggler! And it makes Nanay happy every time. It also makes me uncomfortable too, especially when there is a fake contraction that hardens my stomach for quite a while. But it's a good sign that you are thriving and hopefully, happy inside Nanay.

I talk to you inside my head. I forget to speak out loud to you but I hope the love I feel you hear with every heart beat. That's at least 50-60 beats a minute. It should reach you. :)

Hold on for at least three more weeks, Little Wiggler! It's best for you so you can gather all strength when the time comes you are finally out. It's not as warm and as comfy as inside me but it is an interesting place to be. Most of the time you are awake, your little head will be figuring things out. I hope you will be excited and not feel too scared. nanay and Tatay and Kuya Alon are here to take care of you. :)

I love you, my Little Wiggler. I can wait to hold you but I have been excited for weeks and weeks and weeks. So when you do come, it will be awesome! 

Misheard lyrics

Alon: Riding Dodong tayo.

Nanay: Riding Dodong?

Alon: Riding Dodong. Pony.

Nanay: Aaaah! Yankee Doodle!

Wika

Nanay was singing "Kung Ikaw ay Masaya" in Tagalog and English.

Alon: again!

Nanay: ano gusto mo, English o Tagalog?

Alon: Talagog!

Silly boy

Alon accidentaly hit my eye with his hand.

I told him, "natamaan ng kamay ni Alon mata ni Nanay. Kiss mo."

He kisses his hand and laughs.

I had to laugh too despite the paun in my eye.

You're two!

Nanay has been anticipating your birthday for months.  We weren't going to have a party but Nanay was just both excited and nostalgic. For a week, Nanay has been telling you about your coming birthday.  You would smile and say, "Abby?" or "Vince?"  Theirs was the last birthday party you attended so that is why you probably thought it was theirs we were going to celebrate.

I told you that that it was YOUR birthday and you were to turn two.  It was probably a day or two before your birthday that when I broached the topic and said "Birthday na ni Alon sa Friday!"  This time you answered, "Jollibee?"  You answered the same thing the next day.  I'm not a big fan of fast food for you (though we often eat McDonald's pancakes on weekends, to be honest) but since it was your birthday, I decided that we should indulge you with your request.

But that is getting ahead of how we spent your day.  So let me start properly.

When you woke up, Nanay told you it was your birthday.  You had a big smile on your face and said, "Jollibee?" I agreed that we will eat at Jollibee for lunch. But there were things to do first!

I ordered a beautiful cake from Tita Vannie who makes Adele and Vita cakes. She was on her way to deliver it so we had to meet her downstairs. I gave you a glimpse of your cake when we got it.  You just had a peek of a dinosaur's head and you already had this big smile. That already made it worth it, for both Nanay and Tita Vannie. Then I showed you the cupcakes with dinosaur toppings and your smile got bigger.  Nanay and Tatay are already happy on your birthday seeing how you liked your cake!

We went back up to our room. We got a cupcake and put a candle on it. This time, Nanay was ready and already set aside a box of matches to light your candle.  You were excited to see the candle. I taught you how to blow it and you were able to. Yehey! After that, you ate the dino toppers which you liked. We split the cupcake in three but you only took a small bite. I ate the rest of your share. It was soooo good! Nanay wanted to eat more but had to stop herself because we had to share it with others who were going to visit you.

After we had our cupcake, we changed into our swimsuits and spent the morning at the pool. We also spent the morning swimming during your birthday last year. This time, Nanay asked Tatay to take a leave from work and just spend the day with us. So swimming was more fun with Tatay around.

I'm trying to remember if you took a nap or not after the swim but my nagging feeling is you didn't. We went to Jollibee for lunch to meet Ninong Roy who would not be able to join us with your dinner celebration. We ordered a bucket of chicken for the adults plus spaghetti and fries for you. You had a good helping of spaghetti, eating almost half of it. It was the fries that you liked more, though, shoving piece after piece inside your mouth.

After we were all done with our meal, Nanay took out three pieces of cupcake she brought from home. I put one candle each on two cupcakes but you insisted that the third one should have its own candle too. As you are the celebrant, your wish was our command. We lighted all three candles and you blew all of them one by one. You really liked blowing candles! Again, it was the toppers you wanted to eat though you did have a bit of the cupcake.

When we went back home, you finally took a nap. This was also a chance for Nanay and Tatay to rest a bit. By 5:30PM, Lolo and Lola picked us up so we can have dinner. We decided to eat at TGIFriday's because Lola had a discount card.  Ate Nonay came all the way from school to celebrate your day with you.

I don't think you enjoyed the food as much as Jollibee. You did have some fries. I guess, this was more for the adults than for you. The best part of the night was the cake reveal though. Once Nanay opened the box, your face just lit up seeing the three dinosaurs on top of your cake. We finished the rest of the cupcakes with everybody getting their share, including Tito Arvin and Tita Eva who couldn't make it. Everybody enjoyed the cupcakes. Yey! This made Nanay happy. We're getting cupcakes from Tita Vannie again. Hehehe!

The staff of TGIF surprised you with a song and an ice cream/coffee dessert. You were indeed surprised. You were just looking at them while they were singing. It took you a while to recover. You only started appreciating the singing when they sang for someone else already.

It was a happy day for Nanay, celebrating your second birthday. Happy because you were also happy. We did not have a grand birthday celebration like your first, but we had our family together and that is what made it meaningful.

Oh, my two year old toddler! I can't wait to see the tricks that you learn as you grow older. It's been two months since then and boy have you picked up a lot already. Let's see what three will be like. For now, we enjoy you being two. :)

Anxiety of a second time Mom

I've got seven to eight weeks to go before I pop. It is quite interesting to note that I am more anxious now than I was with the first.  Maybe because we were already four years married when Alon came.  It felt the right time to have our first child.  Our coming soon was a surprise... unplanned and unexpected but definitely not unwelcome.

It has only been a little over two years ago but I'm acting like I was not pregnant before. I wonder if the hardening of my stomach is normal (yes, it is) or why I am always breathless (again, normal, but something I did not experience much with the first).  I'm trying to remember if I should bathe the newborn twice a day or once is enough. There are a lot of things about taking care of a newborn that I feel clueless about again.  We still have not started getting things the little one may need and I intend to cram every thing on my eighth month.  Small things that I paid extra attention to before, I have not been able to do now.

The main reason is I do have a toddler who is quite demanding of my attention now. As a working mother, I utilize my time at home playing and caring for my panganay. I could hardly do anything else until he is fast asleep. This may be part of my anxiety, I think. I sometimes worry if I prepared Alon enough for the arrival of a new person who will be as demanding as he is. I've bought books about new babies. I showed him his baby photos. I talk to him every night. I ask him to talk to my tummy.  Still, I know that when the baby is there, things will take its own shape.

I am also concerned if I have enough in me to care for two human beings? Three, counting the hubby. Hehe! I'm already exhausted just taking care of one toddler.  How will I fare once you throw in a newborn in the mix? I don't want either child feeling neglected by Nanay.  Right now, I'm trying to relegate more to Jan and the yaya but Alon seems to want me more than ever.  It might be he is sensing something big is coming and making the most of it.

I pray constantly that these two brothers would be friends, that they will care for each other.  I pray for guidance that we can foster that love between them. 

There is also my concern about finances.  Kids cost.  I've been lucky that I could sustain breastfeeding and that we use cloth nappies more than disposables.  These alone has helped manage extra expenses that come with having a child.  Right now, I'm uncertain how much further we can stretch our limited budget. We will need to move a bigger place, save up for hospital expenses (this is not where my taxes go, for sure), hire an additional yaya, and other small things he will need that eventually accumulates.

I do remind myself that finances should be the least of my worries because it will be the easiest to deal with. Jan and I are blessed with jobs.  So yes, while we have to stretch our financial capacities, we will not starve.  There will be a roof over our head, food on our plates and love in our hearts.  In other words, we will survive. We will even be happy. :)

I just have to remind myself to keep faith. In God, with Jan, with our kids, with people who love us.  All shall be well. :)

TV and gadgets

I have tried my best to not expose Alon to television and gadgets too young.  I was hoping to keep him screen-free until two years old but by the time he was one and a half, he was watching some television with us.  Mostly Masterchef Australia.  It was never interesting enough to keep him attentive for more than five minutes though.  So I'm still generally satisfied with his amount of exposure.

I'm not against gadgets and screens per se but I hope to raise him more interested in activities and people than screens.  Neither Jan or I are techies anyway.  It has been working so far.  He prefers playing with his friends over watching television.  He likes playing with his toys and still can be cajoled into reading books.

Lately, I have allowed him to watch some movies and play with the iPod/iPhone.  The main reason why this happened is because I've gotten so huge that I can no longer keep up in running after him.  He's also gotten a bit demanding, asking me to carry or play with him more.  I really wish I could but I'm a glutinous blob now and most of my movement is through waddling and rolling.  I need more breaks now and somehow gadgets and TV helps me have it.

He never watches or plays unsupervised though.  I make it a point that I explain what we see or ask him about what he's seen.  There are times he would be so engaged that he would not respond but I try as much as possible to make sure he doesn't get into such a deep stupor. 

He's seen quite a few movies already and it's interesting the things he's picked up from the shows.

Frozen. Olaf the Snowman is his favorite.  Because of Olaf, he started eating carrots (because of the carrot nose), so hurray for that!

Cars. He absolutely loves it.  He's known about Mater since Christmas since we gave him some small toy cars which included Mater and Lightning McQueen.  He learned about traffic lights from the movie.  Now, he likes waiting for traffic lights when we are on the road.

Despicable Me 2. Minions. Nuff said.
 
It was also only recently that I allowed him to watch or play educational games on the iPod/iPhone.  He likes watching songs and playing. He seemed to have lost interest in it lately though.  He hasn't asked to play "Puzzingo" in the past couple of days.

I got a new iPad mini.  I was looking through some videos and he wanted to watch with me.  I ended up showing him a video of a catterpillar transforming into a butterfly.  It was not a kiddie video, but I was doing a commentary during the transformation.  Much to my delight, when the video finished, he wanted to see it again.

Right now, I'm quite happy with our progress with the gadgets.  He still prefers physical play and that's what matters to me.  I put a time limit when he can watch and play with gadgets.  He'd put a bit of a tantrum when we end but he can be easily distracted to pay attention to something else.  At the same time, I get a chance to breathe for a while.

Let's see how it goes when I have a second baby to manage.  I wonder if I can keep the new one screen free for long.  Hah.